Justice has been served.

Ello ello! How are all my electronically gifted moderately intersted friends? Hopefully everyone survived Monday. Speaking on that. I was driving home from the grind last night, stuck in bumper to bumper traffic when suddenly I witnessed my very first HIGH SPEED CHASE! That's right Ladies and dudes....it was awesome. Let me paint you a word picture. So there I am sitting there on Southbound 225 not moving, thinking about that scene in Office Space where the old lady with the walker is outpacing traffic, when out of the corner of my eye I see all sorts of Police (The Heat, 5-O, pigs, the FUZZ, po-po's, coppers) flying up the shoulder of the Northbound lanes. Well they were chasing some dweb on a crouch rocket. They caught up to him and were pinching him towards the wall. The guy had no choice but to stop the bike, or become a grease stain. Well instantly there are 15 Police officers around said moron. The first cop runs over and pulls the guy off the bike, but he breaks the officers grasp and runs directly into what I can only assume and describe as the most dominant center in the Aurora Police Basketball League EVER! This Shaq like Justice enforcer than lifts the helmet clad perpetraitor into the air and body slams him onto the hood of a Police car. Now many people might have seen this as "Police brutality" but I'll put the kabosh on that thought right now. I personally believe that stupidity should be painful, and if that pain resonates from the long arm of the Law Suplexing a bad guy through a Cop car, then so be it.
I ran across a petition on the magical interwebnet today askign for Pepsi CO to once again make and distribute Crystal Clear Pepsi. How silly is that. I had honestly forgot about the greatest beverage I drank the summer of 1993. It made me laugh, reminisce.....I signed the petition.
I must go part-take in my allowed mid-day meal.
The Colorado Avalanche signed good ole #21 yesterday....we will win the cup! If you don't know who I'm talking about......we will not be close companions.
Happy Birthday Johnny Cash, RIP.
Bye-bye

The No meat, 1 month challenge

That's right. I have been challenged by one of my co-workers (not really sure if I should say her name, because she's not in america legally!) to see if I can go 1 entire month without eating meat. I accepted the challenge, because quite frankly I don't know how to turn one down....it will undoubtedly be my downfall. God forbid someone challenge/dare me to bite the lower lip of a shark or Streak naked into a fiery inferno.....again. Back to the task at hand, Starting on March 1st, 2008 I will not consume any meat (fish is excluded as a clause in the contract) until the calender month is over at 12:00 am April 1st. I'm fairly confident I can do it, though I am very aware of how hard it will be. Hopefully I don't get delusional with Bloodlust and start to visualize everyone as giant walking chicken legs and T-bone steak cuts. I do want to make it perfectly clear I am not doing this for any animal rights movement or left wing activist group ect. I could care less. I am a hunter, I use bacon as a condiment and I don't even check when I buy my Bumblebee Tuna to see if it's "Dolphin safe" because I don't care....and honestly I have a slight suspicion that bottlenose dolphin would be very tasty grilled and buttered. Depending on how this 1st challenge commences might call for more to come, stand by for details on those to unfold and PLEASE as always post a comment on your thoughts or ideas.
Statement: With Jahova as my Winess the next grown adult who refers to the Library as the "libary" Might just get a quick order of a Knuckle sandwiches with a side of Karate chops.
NO MEAT! 1 MONTH!

No one said this blog was pretty

This is a brutal new band outta Sweden called the "Cool Candys". Check em out. Their record can be found in your local record store in the "Fugly" Section.

Don't take this personally

Whenever someone utters the above sentence to you, they are definately going to insult you. I'm not real sure how your not supposed to "take it"? I mean is the malicious jerk/person speaking to you assuming you are Schizophrenic and can just change personalities instantly like someone changing the channel? "Oh your going to insult Danny, let me step into Tulley the chimney-sweep for a quick second". It's like saying " this isn't supposed to hurt, but I'm going to drop kick you in the esophagus", same difference. If you have a problem with someone then just tell them like an adult, or call them a "poopyface" behind their back. To answer the most relevant question, NO I haven't been involved in a recent altercation or ruckus....it was more of a public service announcement (incoherent rambling) than anything. And I did overhear a bunch of the smoker ladies flapping their old yellow jaws in the hallway this morning about the some new girl. Saying there's a lot of gossiping in the office workplace is like saying NASA is scientific. Bit of an understatement.
Does anyone bet on the presidency? Like in Atlantic city are there a bunch or over-weight, middle aged men going "Gimme 5 G's on Obama"? I don't have a gambling problem, I was just wondering.
My funny has got the flu, sorry.
I'm gonna get back to work
Believe that.

Gangsta's Paradise

I woke up this morning and the first tune, nay THOUGHT was the song "Gangsta's Paradise" playing continually in my cranuim. "Gangsta's Paradise" was a hit single by the then popular rap artiste Coolio. It accompanied the 1995 gangsta drama flick "Dangerous Minds". Why this horrible noise was attached so strongly to my mind today is confusing. I have serious disdain for rap music and more-so for Michelle Pfifer. Coolio is kinda cute though. He's just so harmless, ya know?
"Power and the money, money and the power Minute after minute, hour after hour Everybody's running, but half of them ain't lookin What's goin on in the kitchen, but I don't know what's cookin"
Good stuff.
I wouldn't mind if my friends started calling me Coolio. I mean, Is there honestly a cooler nickname out there? No way.

Seek cover.

Hello. Or "aloha" as they say in England. First things first, My cousin Willie is very sick in a hospitol in Tucson, hopefully the Doctors can get this bastard of a Staph infection that ailes him taken care of and he can make a hasty recovery. Many thoughts and Prayers with him and the whole Degrave family from all of my family here(Denver, CO) and the 3 or 4 other people who are associated (very losely mind you) with this blog. Yesterday was one of my best mates in the world, Jordie a.k.a Jay a.ka. Pascale the Rascal a.k.a Jordan "I WILL END YOU!" Pascale's 21st Birthday. Hope he has a GOOD ONE. Also, Tornadoes suck (quite literally) hope everyone in the midwest gets back on their feet, my condolences to the families who lost a loved one. It's been crazy windy here and I can't even fathom the hellish chaos a tornado would cause. On a completely out of left field side note: There's a guy that works in the same office building as me, I think he has a hair piece or "rug", because whenever it's windy he gets a sudden case of malaria and calls in sick. I was just reading about this sugar refinery explosion in Georgia. Holy Schnikes! I had no idea that powdered sugar was that flammable or combustable. Once again (What a day huh?) many condolences to the families affected. I promise you I will never view Funeral cakes the same way. Instead of the warm, hap-hazardly shaped delicious pastry covered in powdered sugar I so adored, I will now see a DIRTY BOMB! The TSA is gonna have a field day with this one. Have a good weekend everyone, stay safe for God's sake! Aloha.

Hot off The Press

This just in, Gisele Bundchen has reportedly just broken up (DUMPED!) New England Patriots' very bruised Quarterback, Tom Brady. Apparently she ended their relationship of over a year this morning. When asked the reason for the split Gisele (in a BERY sexy brazilian acent) spoke only the words: "I don't date losers" before being whisked away by her security.
"Manning drops back, he lobs one to the corner of the end zone......he's got Burress wide open! TOUCHDOWN GIANTS!"
Does anyone remember when the Patriots were undeafeted? Remember?
Anyone?
Yeah me neither.

I'm alergic to selfish.

I think this blog is very selfish on my behalf. Blogging is basically an electric Diary of sorts, and I (and Millions more) write down thoughts, hopes, ideas, recipes, rhetorical questions and possibly even haiku's in the self-absorbed, egotistical and pointlessly retarded notion that what we have to say is really that important, interesting or even a little relevant! So with that in mind I have a few things to stamp out. Miley Cyrus is a media megamogel/ monster, go see her movie, buy the soundtrack tell me how it is. Go Giants! I'm really pulling for you guys, I overall just want to see a good game. The Mars Volta have a newish album out, this is a band EVERYONE can get into. Seriously their songwriting is progressive, it's almost Red Hot Chili Peppers meets Zeppelin-esque. If your not a fan or soon to be fan of theirs then I don't know what your doing with your life....I really don't.
An interesting development I'll share with you (for my own pleasure obviously). It's no secret that I am willed by forces beyond me to prank my friends, family, co-workers and passerby's. Well this caused an interesting twist in things. Yesterday everyone in my office, except me decided to prank each other very spontaneously. Well in a "peter cried wolf" type reaction to the finding of ones self the victim of a prank everyone decided to blame me! I was the only one who did not partake in such shenanigans! Funny how things unfold huh?
Millermothra out.